A Marriage with a Spark
Long weeks, busy days at work and at home, the kids demanding every ounce of you, and your relationship with your spouse is the last thing on your mind. Sound familiar? I understand that this is a very common scenario for married couples who are parents. It’s hard to be mom/dad and still have a marriage with a spark. Routine and the overwhelming task of parenting can be deadly to a marriage. I know firsthand that parents think that if they take care of the needs of their children everything else is secondary. Maybe there is some truth to that but if you don’t take care of your marriage relationship what does that “tell” your kids? If you neglect your spouse (or your relationship with them) it’s very easy for your feelings to “cool-off” and start to deteriorate.
My husband and I often talk about missing our life as newly married couple. We miss the many late night conversations over good food and wine. We miss being able to decide tonight that we will be taking a trip tomorrow morning (that’s why we started our web business- to help make travel with kids easier for other parents). Mostly, we miss having fun together in a playful loving way because we are always so concerned with getting things done for the girls. Have you ever been in that boat? Do you wish you could spend more adult time with your spouse?
We know we need to find time for each other but we need to be able to have loving playful banter in-front of our girls as much as we need some private time so we need to make a conscious effort to help keep a spark in our marriage. Since both of us are music lovers I’m starting there. Trying to put together a relaxing, fun playlist I came across Tommy Torres’ new video 11:11 and was blown away by all the emotions it stirred up. Watch it so you understand what I’m talking about. If you’re not familiar with Tommy you’ll be surprised that you may have heard many of his songs which he has produced or composed for other artists such as Ricardo Arjona, Ednita Nazario, Alejandro Sanz, Alicia Keys, and Ricky Martin. He’s a Grammy Award winning Puerto Rican producer, singer, and songwriter and this new song makes me want to run home and find a babysitter.
I’m sharing the video here and will work on my playlist. Now to find the time to listen to some music with my husband over a nice glass of wine… even if the girls are playing in their room and we have 100 other things that need to get done. Here’s to a marriage with a spark.